I didn’t intend to build an altar. I don’t worship.  But I knew what had to stand in place of that guitar.  And I know honouring now, like I did not before.  Like a parent, I guide and narrate what is left of me – what grows – now that there is no body with which to commune.  

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It turns out

The sweater is just a sweater. The coffee shop is a place I have been many times, with many people. And today it is three years but I will not weep for that.

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And when the margaritas hit, he performed a one handed push up show, the dog racing around him in delight.  We both wove ourselves into the hanging lights, and revelled in each other and the warm, skylit evening.  

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Show me the money

And to those with their nose in their wallets, I raise my cup high. That kind of discontent is not to be held, nor will it be caught by me.  The only blessing to which I assign value is this peace, this beautiful peace that tells me that nothing was lost.  All is, as it should be.  

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Now, judgement and want are curiously similar.  I have something in my hand – something received – and I might witness how it changes me.  I remain, both filter and vision.  

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